This is what happens when your mom makes a left turn onto the highway and there is a vehicle hidden behind the truck that is turning.  My mom is 72, she is a little firecracker.  She gets up at dawn works in her garden, cleans her house, go, go ,go.  She’s unbelievably tough and though she won’t admit it, because she’s also stubborn as a mule, she’s becoming fragile.

This kind of thing scares me to death. 

I know mom and dad have to go sometime but I sure don’t want it to be like this.  You know what drives me batty about this whole thing?  My sister kept asking me if I was sure the truck was totaled.  “Umm yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s totaled, will you forget the truck and let me concentrate on mom, okay?”  Damn!!  For the record she walked away from the accident.  She wouldn’t even go in for a checkup.  She picked glass out of her own face,  and crushed jet beads out of her neck, I know she had at least one cracked or broken rib because it hurt her to breathe.  She also is having spasms in her back, though they’re getting better every day. 

Needless to say stubborn is a mild word for my mom.  I know people half her age who would be screaming for pain pills and the only time I ever heard her scream was for everyone to leave her alone.  Actually scream isn’t the right word, it was more of a deadly quiet “Will you leave me alone” kind of thing.  You know how moms are when they mean business. 

Moral of the story and big lesson learned. 

If your making a left turn onto a 4 lane road make damn sure both lanes of oncoming traffic are clear.  You would be surprised at the size of a vehicle that can be hidden on the inside lane.

P.S. big thanks to john and Mo for helping me out with my add image problem, look it worked.  Thanks guys!

I didn’t get to go to St. Louis.  I completely forgot that we had to move youngest daughter Emily into her college dorm, you would think that as her mom I wouldn’t forget something so important.

you would be wrong.

this is it!!!  The University of Arkansas in Fayetteville.  If you click the picture you get the web cam, if you get nothing it’s probably night-time, not much to see then.

I know it’s a big deal, her moving and going off to the university, but this is the third time we have moved her into a dorm so it’s not like anything unusual.  She went to a residential school her junior and senior years of high school, so we have the moves in and out of a dorm down pat.  Anyway, since I didn’t get to go to St. Louis this time I decided to take some of the suggestions I got for that trip and apply them to Fayetteville Arkansas, which is where we went to drop Emily for school.  Food, food and more food.  Doc, jen and MyKi all made that suggestion, I love people that think like me. 

My favorite cousin and his wife live about 10 minutes from the university campus so when we go to Fayetteville we always stay with them, they know all the best places to eat, drink and be merry.  The second night we we’re there we ate at a place called The Powerhouse, called that because, well, it’s an old powerhouse.  They serve a drink there that tastes like Hawaiian Punch but is so alcoholic  that your only allowed to have two, it’s called a kilowatt.  Yeah, you’ll get lit up alright!!  It’s good to go to dinner with family because everyone’s plate is fair game. I skipped my salad completely because it was an uninspired mix of iceberg lettuce and a random tomato figuring that the main course would be better. I’m glad I skipped it, I got blackened salmon with crab so good that it’s indescribable, at least by me.  With a really good side of etouffe and sweet cornbread muffins.  yum!  Hubby had the scampi with linguini, also delish, and favorite cousin had red snapper and some kind of pasta, all I remember about that one was I liked it too.  Now before you think what a pig, I took half of mine home and ate it for breakfast.   

“
“You must remember this, a kiss is still a
kiss”. Your romance is Casablanca. A
classic story of love in trying times, chock
full of both cynicism and hope. You obviously
believe in true love, but you’re also
constantly aware of practicality and societal
expectations. That’s not always fun, but at
least it’s realistic. Try not to let the Nazis
get you down too much.

And yes, it really is almost 3:30 AM  This is why I belong to the late night bloggers blog ring.  Insomnia!

 I am going to St. Louis, Mo. today.  I’ll only be there a couple of days so I would like to know:

If you only had time to see or do one thing in St. Louis what would it be and why?

New subject, tired of the old one.

Man am I glad we’re back up and running, it was a long week, made even longer by an attack on our computer by the worm that seanmeister blogged about.  Just my luck that by the time Xanga was back up we had gone the long route and figured it out ourselves.  Actually I’m giving myself way to much credit, I watched and whined Barry did all the fixing.  Either way, we (he) had it all done by the time the power was back on. 

I absolutely adore men, some I don’t even know.  (in person)  The thing is, when you read a persons blog everyday you get to know them somewhat.  Unless of course they are a seriously talented fiction writer.  (If they’re that talented they should be writing good books not good blogs.)  Anyway, some of these guys are goofy, caring, talented, wonderful, protective women loving men.  I can tell when a man loves women.  You can see it in their face and read it in their words.  There is an almost lustfulness for women as an entire sex.  Not just one woman, but all women.  How can you not love a man that loves you just because you’re female?  It doesn’t even matter that there is not and never will be anything physical, because for these special men that’s not what it’s about.

Made two CDs today

Mowed the yard

Washed the car

Watched a slasher movie

What a day.

It’s three AM I know where my kids are, Do you know where yours are?  LOL

Everyone knows someone who was raped, whether they know it or not.  After 25 years of living with my rape I chose to forgive because I am not that 16 year old girl anymore.  I did some checking and found out that he is not that 16 year old boy anymore either.  My personal experience was never reported and very few knew about what happened, but it left me changed.  I lived with those feeling for so long that to tell the truth I’m relieved to have closure.  It was good to find out that he too had to live with what happened, that he either grew a conscience or had one that he ignored that night so long ago.  It felt good to know that I had the power to forgive or not.  I was the parole board.  I released us both for good behavior.  I thought that I was the only one serving that 25 years but it appears that I wasn’t alone in that cell after all.

I watched Jerry Maguire tonight, it’s been so long since I’ve seen it that it turned out to be a treat.  Like revisiting an old friend.  I’m just sappy enough to appreciate the “You had me at hello” line. 

?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 

I registered for classmates.com about two years ago to find an old friend, I found him and we’ve kept in touch ever since.  It was a really great thing and easy to do.  It never occurred to me that anyone other than my old friends who have e-mailed me on and off since I signed up would use the site to find me.  How naive.

I got an e-mail from a guy, not just any guy, the guy who date raped me in high school.  He asked me to forgive him.  It’s seems he took a contract in our old home town and when he drove by my old house he ”nearly hyperventilated” “Hence, time to ask for forgiveness.”  So what do we think dear Xangans?  You tell me what you think and then I’ll tell you what I think. fair enough. 

I feel sorta guilty talking that way about my sisters.  I guess everyone has issues with their family but mine shouldn’t have anything to do with being in charge of dad.  He is the one who moves wherever me and my husband go, and I have always been the maternal one of the family, so it’s natural for him to rely on me.  The funny thing is we all know that my sister Nancy is his “favorite” but he knows that she has problems and can’t take care of herself much less him.  That leaves me, “the responsible one”.  So even though they have know idea I called them chicken shit sisters I feel bad, because like always when it comes crunch time they will be right here helping out and supporting me.  And somewhere in all of this one of them will say something hysterically funny and it will all be better than fine.

Today would be an excellent day to go the lake.  It’s really hot and humid the way it always is in Arkansas this time of the year.  A friend of mine has a boat and the thought of taking it to Sugar Loaf mountain in the middle of the lake appeals to me greatly.  So I think that I will do that.  My motto of late has been “Earth as Therapy” so now would be a good time to see my therapist.  She works cheap and has great office hours.

Here’s hoping everyone has a great day!

Beware Rant Below…may or may not be coherant!

 Well it never rains…it POURS.  Case in point!

I am soundly sleeping this A.M. when my oldest daughter Allison and her boyfriend come barging into the bedroom to tell me that a very good friend of ours totalled her car.  He was on his way home from the night shift and fell asleep at the wheel.  He is incredibly lucky that he wasn’t injured.  Get this though, he is the father of my god-daughter who is so sick with the kidney reflux problems.  (As if his plate isn’t full enough.)  To top this tale, we paid off said daughters car as a high school graduation present, so she wouldn’t have a payment hanging over her head and we could drop the insurance to liability only.  So now she’s out a car, we’re out $50.00 for the tow plus all the maintenance we did on it not even two weeks ago.  That’s not even counting the money we put into it over the last year, tires, batteries, ad naseum.  Can you say it with me……..     TOTALLY SCREWED.    

Then to add to the deluge, as if that wasn’t enough to make a perfect Monday.  I get notified by the Veterans Hospital that my 82 year old dad needs immediate surgery to remove a Carotid Artery blockage.  So I got the fun task of calling to schedule the surgery and notify all three of my sisters.  After the way the day had started I told them they better get their butts out here to help me.  No way am I doing this alone the way I had to do with mom’s breast biopsies.  That was quite enough thank you very much, you chicken shit sisters that left me behind to deal with your divorced, crazy, neurotic parents.  This is the part that kills me everytime I think about it…  All three of my sisters are older, all three do not have dependant children, two are unemployed by choice, two are supported by fantastic guys, and they all three live as far as possible from above mentioned divorced, crazy, neurotic parents.  Me?  I raised my sisters son plus my two girls, work full-time, and am the primary caregiver of my dad.  WTF?  You bet they better get their collective asses down here.

Okay I’m done!  Thank You for letting me vent some of the steam that was going to give me a stroke!

The baby:

As I said before Victoria has grade four kidney reflux.  On Wed. we took her to Children’s Hospital in Little Rock.  The pediatric urologist put her on a daily maintenance dose of antibiotics to keep her from getting continual urinary tract infections.  In four months she goes back for a treatment that if all goes perfectly will cure her. If all doesn’t go perfectly she will have surgery and will be cured anyway.  So now we wait! 

For whatever reason this p.o.s. computer does not like me or xanga.  It does not want me to post or read, yet any other member of the family may happily use it.  So being the contrary person I am, I will do as I please and just keep on typing.  In bit and pieces.